Do Scanners Have Bad Memories?

This exchange just took place on my bulletin board (at www.barbarasher.com/boards):


Do Scanners Have Bad Memories?

shparks on Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:01

I have always had a crummy memory. I don't recall a lot of specific details about my childhood. I am always forgetting to do things, or forgetting ideas that I had, or forgetting why I walked into a room. I have been wondering if the reason I have so much trouble with remembering things is because, as a Scanner, I always have too many things on my mind to keep straight.

Do other Scanners have that problem?

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skannie on Sun Oct 26, 2008 3:23

Yes, I do. It's otherwise known as absent-mindedness, and is supposed to be a sign of great intelligence
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I liked that, especially the 'sign of great intelligence' thing, and try to keep it in mind since I too, have a bad memory. Well, about some things. I do happen to know all the words to all the pop songs ever written.

But I can't find things.

I was always like this, even as a kid. I could never find things I was looking for even if they were right in front of me. Especially in closets. And drawers. And on shelves. Later, when I was older I realized this extended to glove compartments and supermarkets. Bookstores, too, but so many books on the shelves are terrifically interesting that you forget what you were looking for and enjoy what you found. Which is not a bad way to live, actually.

But back then, my mom would say, after finding the missing thing, "If it were a snake it would have bitten you," which, as a small child, always gave me pause, though I was never entirely sure why.

My dad would say, 'Take your eyes in your hands!" Now, that fascinated me. I could envision it and would hold out my hands and move them around, pretending I had eyes in my palms. It was very jolly, but as I grew a little older I realized it didn't make much sense. It might have been handy for some people to have their eyes in their hands (especially for looking behind and under things in dark closets, in case there was a mouse or a spider there), but not for me, not with my eyes, because I wouldn't have been able to see what was in front of them no matter where they were stationed. (Now that I'm all grown up I have a hunch he was translating from Russian or Yiddish and it lost something in the translation.)

The discussion on my bulletin board continued:
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kashtanka on Wed Oct 29, 2008 1:20

I'm forgetful, too. I'll get to places and have no memory of driving there. A woman I know was talking about traffic grievances, and I said "I always have too much on my mind to give it much attention."

Another thing. I forget what's on my activity schedule all the time. A friend will ask "Are you looking forward to next Saturday?" There's an awkward silence and then I mumble a few words in hopes that she'll tell me what the activity is. Dangerous business that is.
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Now that's fixable. I'll have to tell kashtanka: Use iCal!! I had the same problem when, years after it appeared on my latest mac, I decided to try iCal. It's super. Sometimes I write thoughts in it, or write something I've already done and check it off and feel very productive. Sometimes I even start a journal, and once I decided to write three things I was happy about, and planned to do that every evening, but I forgot to continue.

Still, it's great. See, you write in it and then later it pops up on your screen to remind you to do something exactly when you told it to. If you click on it, all the details appear as well as long notes you wrote yourself about what to bring or say or do. When it comes to appointments, it's like magic.

Or should be. Actually, the little box that pops up goes in front of whatever you were reading and no matter where you move it, it's always in the way and becomes very irritating. But you do look at it, and if it reminds you of something it would have been disastrous to forget, your irritation is replaced with panic, which is good. Not pleasant, but good.

I'm also fond of Resnooze! It's really nice. You write yourself a memo whenever you have a great idea, or there's something you should do over and over (like, 'remember to look in that other email account,' or 'show up for that teleclass you're running,' or 'write the newsletter already!') and they appear and re-appear in your inbox daily, weekly or monthly until you do them. Or until you stop seeing them. Because when something is in your inbox repeatedly, it sort of becomes a thing and subject to the invisibility problem. You don't even open it after awhile. It turns into wallpaper and when you see it you don't give the subject line your full attention. You wonder faintly if it's spam and you delete it. Over and over. Until you figure out how to turn it off.

So, if you know a system for finding things when you're certain they're right in front of you but you can't see them anyway, just let me know. In the meantime, here's a law of nature that will help you avoid frenzy:

It is only possible to find things when you no longer need them. Give up and do something else.

And its corollary, equally true: Once you no longer need things, you will probably find them. It won't make you feel good, of course, because it's kind of like they're making fun of you. But humiliation fades faster than despair, so it's not all bad.

I'll let you know if we come up with something. Feel free to contribute any good ideas you might have.