And now there are suitcases and boxes open and things folded and in baskets and on couches -- all in categories: linen jackets, pants, sandals for the stone masseria in Puglia's warmish weather, classier woolens and knits and shoes for Toulouse (it's France, after all!), and my favorites: down vest and sweatpants and warm socks for the good homey old village in Cappadocia (www.kilimwomen.com). I've never been to Toulouse, and I can remember when I thought anyone who went to Istanbul had probably been to the moon, too. But now, it's a nice place I go. Mystery gone. Familiarity and comfort replace it.
First destination, the retreat for Scanners in Puglia (photos at www.geniuspress.com) - which just about my favorite thing to do. I hope I'll be able to continue doing them overseas, but it gets trickier every year. Still, the emails we've been tossing back and forth indicate that there's going to be another remarkable group of people. One of the unexpected things that come out of retreats are lifelong friendships, and I'm one of the beneficiaries. It's a surprise.
Most of the last 30 years I've worked and lived solo in my home and always loved it. I never feel lonely because I'm in New York, and all you have to do (if you feel like a New Yorker) is go outdoors and you're surrounded by cousins. You get to say hello, of course, they probably do that in Dubuque, but you also get to boss people around. In cold weather I say things like, 'Put your hat on!' to strangers and any time of year I say 'Quit looking for quarters in public phones, Gerald, everyone will think you're crazy!' to people I know by name. People say things to me, too. It's something you either like or you don't.
There's New York when I'm outdoors, and then, for the last 20 years or so, there's been the internet. Well, telnet bulletin boards, and then email and then my own website and bulletin board and then Yahoo groups and now Twitter, I've been in pig heaven, people-wise, with people to communicate with whenever I want, which is pretty much whenever I'm home and awake.
When it comes to interaction, I've never loved the telephone -- when it rang I was wary; when I owed a call I felt burdened -- but I love to write emails. And bulletin boards are better than a crowded theater lobby between acts -- because everybody knows you, and you can listen in or join in to any conversation, and the conversations are usually more interesting than any I ever heard in a theater lobby. And, unlike the theater, this lobby is open whenever I feel like going there. (I can even watch the film of a play first, if I like.) Cocooning has been a personal gift from the universe to me.
But getting to know people face to face in a retreat setting, that's just a jolly thing, unlike other things, especially in an old, stone fortress with secret gardens, and a hidden chapel, and cappuccino & crossants like they don't seem to make it anywhere else. Sitting around the outdoor tables (plastic, I must admit) talking or walking among the short, twisted trunks of ancient olive trees with one person now, someone else later, waking up early and hitching a ride to the pebble beaches and crystal water, or to the internet cafe in the little medieval town nearby -- all the time with this small group of unusual people --is more like being at a reunion than just a vacation, because you sense that these people are going to be old friends.
I'm not the only one who says this. One Scanner retreat is having its second annual reunion in Tuscany this week. The September 07 retreat just had its first reunion in California in August. Just last month, one of our Scanners passed away unexpectedly and we're all grieving because it feels like we knew him all our lives. On Yahoo mail we tell stories of how he had achieved his dream, and pushed everyone to go after theirs.
There are happy things, too. (Our pharmacist from Germany is taking clown lessons!)
I admit the Write-Speak retreats (http://writeyourownsuccessstory.com) are also full of amazing people and they stay together too, working together in teams, cheering each other on to their goals (I'm always returning to snoop in their group emails). But most of the WriteSpeakers confess to being Scanners as well. And Scanners are just plain wonderful people.
If you don't know yet, a Scanner is an eclectic, someone who calls himself-herself a dilettante, a jack of all trades, that sort of derogatory label. I call them multi-talented, generous, intelligent and fascinating people. I wrote a whole book about them and found them to be so amazing, I started the retreats so I could get to know them better. One thing about Scanners (aside from how hard they've been on themselves until now) is that they've rarely been around other Scanners. That's a revelation. But I'll talk about that another time.
Enough socializing. Gotta get back to packing.
